The hour is getting late

and I'm running out of time. Soon I need to make up my mind. I said what need to be said but didn't follow through. Should I fight or let the troll within win again. For the first time in a long time i actually care about something and I can't let it go. Though I've tried it won't let me shake it. So will I allow the troll to let me live content in my fantasy or do I actually fight to make something a reality?

-Tyrone On Everyday

RE: Please grant me a do-over!

1. I would have gone away to college. Or maybe just moved to the dorms at MCA. I've been living with my mother way too long. That change could have started there.

2. I would have gotten into running or a baseball in high school. I've never really been big on sports. But I've always liked to hit a baseball every now and then. Even if wasn't good at it. Asfar a running, lately I've just felt the need to but i just haven't.

3.I would started playing the guitar when I was kid. I could have been the next George Benson by now.

4. I would have started painting in high school. Just something i should have been doing back then.

5. I should have hung out more with my friends in high school. I don't know what was wong with me back then. But I really didn't want to go out anywhere or really do anything other talk comic books.

6. I would be a little more talkative mainly speacially with women. It's not hard for me to talk to women i know but it's different when you kind of like them. I know they are looking for me to say something but words fail me everytime and it's frustating as shit.

There's probably more but nothing else is coming to mind. So, for now i'll just say...

TO BE CONT.

-Tyrone On Everyday

life on pluto

thinking and typing...need to go pick my meds and get another refilled. need to wash my car. need to clean out the flower bed some more. need to get motivated. doesn't seem to be happening. thinking about music. no more sappy love songs please. too late...sadly looking forward to going to work. don't seem to do much outside of working for four hours five days a week. wish i knew if I had finally fucked up and lost my chance. being a mind reader would help. you saying something would be even better. but that's not happening. wish these fucking things on the back of my head would go away. the sleep will get me soon. don't want to get sucked into a interesting new world only to have it ripped away from me and wake up back in this one. need to get over it. will soon me thinks. if i can give up my love for all things action figure-ish i can give up my love for other things. rant rant ramble ramble self loathe self loathe. the sleep almost just had me. women...143-829 could say a lot of things. for fear of someone i know reading this i won't. just lost the sleep. too much thought not enough action but that's life on pluto. my cold little distant planetoid. cast off from the sun. one day we'll get there.

-Tyrone On Everyday

UPDATE:
Nothing is ever over. No chances are ever lost. Like said being a mind reader would help but I know all I need to know. I just don't do. Why you ask? I just haven't figured out how. I know what I want to say and I know they want to heard. But we'll get there. It'll just take a little longer.

Tacovia

dream time...

I went to this old building. It look like something out of the 1950's. This guy told me go there because the had really good fish tacos. I saw the guy he pointed me over to the guy selling the fih tacos. They looked good so i bought two. Tasted one of them. Told the guy it was good, took my other taco and made my way to another room in the building. In this room was a young black family. It was a young mother about three children. The father had just arrived and he was going in and out of the room. The young mother got up and the dress and flown up and you could see the shorts she was wearing underneath the skirt. I asked her"ma'am,how old are you?'. Twenty-five", she repiled. I then asked her what her names was. She said, "Tacovia"as she smiled. I was like wow I can't forget that face because somehow I knew I would be here long. I said i'm gonna look you up Tacovia, as in look her up in the future time where i'm from. She asked me if I was trying to run a number on her. I said no i just dont want to forget you. She said well you can always see me, i'll be the one out on the balcony. She gave me two pictures. In both pictures she was in the background and you could barely see her face. and like that I was transported way and woke up.

-Tyrone On Everyday

Need Know Believe

I know what I want. I think I know what she want. but why cant I talk to her. I told how i felt. and it's still hard to get over that hump. I keep saying I need to get it together and I'm trying. slow and steady win the race. but what do I need to get who i need. I have the courage. I think I have the will. Am I over thinking this? Should I just let time take it's course? I've always felt that i was slow and behind the curve but some how I always get to where I need to be. I know how it's gonna be. I just need to believe. I believe in me. I believe she wants it to be with me. And that's all I need.

-Tyrone On Everyday

2 Months In

War against yourself is long hard struggle. You lose more battles than you win. But you learn more about yourself in the process.

to be cont.

Out and About

So, yah boy went to bible study of all things last night. It was interesting but nothing i'd ever want to do again. After my people find out I will b mocked for the rest of my days but I can take it. HA!

A few co-workers are planing on going to Hot Springs, Arkansas. Not exactly sure if they meant a water park or what but I said I didn't want to go but I kinda do. Not sure about road trips. I'm trying to put myself out there more but I don't know about this. Even if I ultimately don't go it won't be the end of the world.

On a totally different note, I'm never asking for advice ever again. It just feels like I'm baring my soul and I never feel right about it. So, fuck it. I'll figure it out on my own. I usually know what to do, I just to need muster up enough courage to do it.


-Tyrone On Everyday

a few ideas

Greenie Tre 3-O
Summertime Wars
Cashmere Glamor Baby
Jump Man
Sam
coming soon...

-Tyrone On Everyday

Off the Wall

Went bowling with the co-workers yesterday. Not much to report. Bowled one round. Talked to a few people. Had fun. Saw Bruno too. I was not ready for that movie. It was pretty good though.

-Tyrone On Everyday

Hello July, I won't miss you when you're gone

too early in the morning. I shouldn't be posting but fuck it! Another work day gone another few dollars earned.Is it wrong to want to "Hulk out" and destroy everyone and everything in your path? Yes, but I need to do something to make me feel better. I cant stop these thoughts from haunting. I dont how kill these thoughts so I can uplift myself. I'm an adult and I live like a recluse. watching people live and things happen around me. And wishing I could get over myself and join. I'll figure it out someday. Just wish that day would come sooner than later. I try to be positive about things but monster in my head is just too strong sometimes. Rambling again. Goodnight.

-Tyrone On Everyday (toe)